• Akosua Acheampong

No longer newlyweds – 3 year and counting

Updated: Oct 1, 2019

My husband and I recently celebrated our three year wedding anniversary; it is safe to say that we have definitely left the newlywed phase and entered into a more settled, rhythmic, and somewhat comfortable existence that I’m in no way dissatisfied with. I think there’s tranquility in being “comfortable”. This word isn’t always popular as it implies a marriage has entered into a lazy phase, the wife no longer wears sexy underwear and the husband has developed a beer gut. To be fair, there’s nothing wrong with this either (if that is what a happy marriage means to you). For us, we seem to have finally found the beat we can both bop along to peacefully. He knows me and I know him. It took some rough rides to get here but it is a nice realisation when you can finally coexist in a harmony that is rare to find.

Anyway, we decided to keep our celebrations simple. The first anniversary we have spent at home and not travelled but neither of us (mainly I) was prepared to leave our 6 month old son at home and actually, he is a major part of our three year story so I wanted to celebrate it with him also. If you know us, then you know that we absolutely love to eat, we often have endless conversations (and debates) about the best foods we have had and what we want to try. I am probably a bigger foodie than my husband so I couldn’t wait for the day to unfold.

The luck of the weather was on our side. I got out my mum belly in a semi crop-ish top and denim skirt and was ready to go. Can I just say there is nothing more beautiful than a body that has just bore a life, as much as we all always want to look our best, we must also embrace each season. On this day, my season was a slight mum belly with a recti diastasis of two finger separation.

Ok so I was going omit this part out of the blog but my husband INSISTED I should be as truthful as I have been on other blogs so (embarrassingly) here goes. Approximately once a week, my husband refers to me as the “tight-fisted” one. Rightly so because I love a bargain and I love to save money wherever possible. I said to him “babe let me organise our anniversary lunch, I’ll find somewhere super cute for us to go”. Onto Wowcher I went and low and behold, came across this amazing bargain: two 3 course meals and a bottle of Prosecco for a whopping £19! I was sold; I looked at a picture or two of the location but to be honest all I kept seeing were pound signs. When we eventually got to the venue, judging the book by its cover on this occasion would have been the right thing to do because it was as terrible inside as it was outside. We reluctantly asked for a table for two; we were just in shock, especially when I spotted a few flies making themselves at home on the tables. I tried, thought positive thoughts, took deep breaths but no rose tinted glasses could make us eat from the hell hole. We gracefully thanked the waitress for the table, asked her to revoke our Wowcher code redemption and legged it. Lesson here is, it’s not good to cheap out on your anniversary date!

Onto greener pastures, we eventually had a lovely lunch of ribs, chicken wings, tacos and burgers at TGI Friday, while my son indulged in his exquisitely pureed HIPP Organic rice and chicken with vegetables. We were winning all round. Over our lunch we got to reflect on some of our best moments over the 3 years and realised that we had grown so much. Sometimes it may seem like you have a long way to go, but it’s always good to look back and see how far you have come in life. For my husband and me, we had both undergone mental, spiritual and emotional transformations since our days of courtship, which have all contributed to solidifying our bond. We are definitely the yang to each other’s ying.

We ended the afternoon with a nice stroll to one of our favourite dessert places, Caffe Concerto. I always feel as though I have stepped into a quaint yet extravagant spot in Paris whenever I see this place and I love it. We ordered some of our favourites and completely devoured everything. Their pistachio and cream cakes are to die for and I opted for a maccha latte which was a first for me. My husband was more dubious and when he asked me what it tasted like, all I could say was “green”; I’d definitely try it again.

It is safe to say that we were totally stuffed by the time we made our way back to our suburbia bliss away from the hustle and bustle of the city. Looking back on the day, I couldn’t have asked for anything more. My heart and life is so full and I am forever thankful to God for blessing me with this amazing little family of mine. We look forward to what this fourth year of marriage has to bring, with excitement and anticipation. Stay tuned :)

Before I completely check out, here are the 5 things I’ve learnt since getting married:

1. Don’t argue with your spouse, learn to have healthy “discussions” about whatever it is you are in disagreement about (avoid the temptation to knock the side of their heads)

2. Men truly are from Mars and women are from Venus. We don’t always process information the same way so it is pointless expecting him to see things from your perspective all the time

3. Men can find it hard to express how they feel, so when they do, acknowledge it and let them get all their sentences out without interrupting. Once they shut up, floodgates may not open for another year

4. Men wash the dishes really well! Even if it takes them an extra hour to finish

5. Last but not least, appreciate the little things you do for each other; major on the majors and minor on the minors. You won’t always get everything right but a positive perspective goes a long way.

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